The Importance Of Thank You Notes
Posted: Tuesday, February 12, 2008
by Marilyn Bohn
Get It Together Organizing
A few years ago a friend called to tell me how grateful she was to me. She had been reading over past thank you notes and she thanked me for my 'sweet' note. She shared with me that she had kept all the thank you notes she had received over the past 30 years and as she was going over them it brought back memories of her friends.
I enjoyed our conversation even though I had no memory of the note I had sent her. I thought it rather strange to keep thank you notes. But then as I thought about it I decided to keep thank you notes that were sent to me. I put them in a note book and once in a blue moon I look back at them. I can't remember doing most of the things people have thanked me for, but their note conjures up past friendships and gives me a good feeling.
Most of our mail each day is filled with advertisements and bills. A handwritten note or a letter immediately moves that correspondence to the top of the pile. When a note is written by hand it shows the other person that you cared enough to take the time to think of them and go to the work of sending them a note. Written notes are also permanent, which means they can be saved by the recipient and passed around to share with others.
I have a friend who has even shared with me thank you notes my adult children have written to her. Not only does she feel good about being appreciated but I feel like I must have done something right.
The acceptable length of time for sending thank you cards for wedding gifts is within three months.
I am not sure this is acceptable etiquette but when my daughter got married she was working and going to University as was her husband. They were super busy so to help them get out their thank you cards we all three spent one Saturday together writing notes. He wrote to those who he knew and she wrote to those she knew. For those whom they didn't know well I helped by writing some of the notes. I would chose a name and tell them who it was from, and what the gift was and then they would tell me what they wanted said. Within two to three weeks of their wedding all thank you notes had been sent out. They received many compliments on getting their notes out so quickly. This made the recipient feel good and they felt good too. (For one thing it didn't weight on their conscious that they had to get the thank you notes done).
Once I received a note thanking me for going to their receptions that it meant a lot to them. I had dropped the gift off at the bride's home a few days before the wedding as I was not going to go to the reception. I knew that was an insincere thank you.
Okay, so how do we go about writing thank you notes?
The first thing is to have all the supplies needed, note cards, envelopes, stamps, pen (blue or black preferred), address of person note will be sent to.
Send thank you notes as quickly as possible. Within 72 hours is preferred, that way you don't forget about sending one. They also seem more sincere when they are expressed promptly.
1. Start with Dear
We all love to read our name in ink.
2. Express Your Gratitude and appreciation. Write in the present-perfect tense, which means to write as if whatever you say is happening at the moment. "Thank you for the beautiful sweater".
3. Mention the gift's usefulness. "It is just what I needed and it is so cold here I want to wear it every day". If you don't like it, don't tell them that, there is always something that can be said positive.
4. If it is appropriate mention the past, allude to the future.
5. End with your regards, use whatever works for you: Love, Yours Truly, With love, As Always. Then sign your name and you're done. Put it in the addressed stamped envelope, and mail it.
Always send notes for:
Wedding gifts
Sympathy flowers
To the hostess after a party that was hosted in your honor
For bridal or baby shower gifts
Gifts received during a hospital stay
After being hosted as a houseguest for one or more nights
For gifts of congratulations
Another kind of thank you note is the Job Interview Thank You Note
The purpose of a job interview thank you note is to express appreciation to the interviewer for taking time out of their busy schedule to speak with you. These notes also serve the added benefit of keeping your name in front of the company as a candidate for the job.
Jill Bremer, AICI,CIP of Bremer Communications says, "The impact of a handwritten thank you note is often overlooked in today's fast paced "why write something when I can email it" world. A note written promptly and sincerely is an important ritual of etiquette that is much more effective and appreciated than a phone call or electronic message".
Never underestimate the power of a thank you. Kim Izzo, etiquette columnist, says, "It's making the effort. People really appreciate getting mail that's not a bill, for one thing, and just taking that extra bit of time to write a thank you note really means everything."
They are such a simple concept. A thank you note is an expression of appreciation for a thoughtful act, expression, or gift. The wording does not have to be perfect, an imperfect note with heartfelt sentiment is better than a perfect note that is never written or sent.
Marilyn Bohn is the owner of Get it Together Organizing, a business dedicated to developing practical organizing solutions that help individuals and business professionals live clutter-free and productive lives. She is the author of "Go Organize! Conquer Clutter in 3 Simple Steps".
Marilyn takes the often stressful subject of organizing and breaks it down into a simple, easy to understand system. Her methods are both eye-opening and encouraging! Visit her website http://www.marilynbohn.com
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